Living While Gray

Age is Just a Number

Don’t Act Like an Adult: Retirement Week 1

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Well, lots going on at Living While Gray while visiting the west coast. Last night, it was visiting the Magic Castle in Hollywood where you definitely shouldn’t act like an adult. I went with this zany group that included my daughter, son-in-law, his sister, and her boyfriend. We were invited, and in Hollywood, even the places that charge an admission fee require an invitation, by an amazing magician friend.

The place is definitely a dress-up kinda place, which was very fun. You see a little of everything and one of our group was dressed very fun. I wish I had her picture because she got a lot of compliments.

My daughter insisted I get my makeup done by a professional as she said I was too old to do the normal 5-minute makeup routine that served me well for years. What do you think? I’m not so sure. I do think it makes my neck look even worse than normal but nothing a little tuck here and there won’t fix.

So, let me tell you a little about our adventure.

First, don’t think about taking a picture inside. It’s strictly no pictures. That’s why we took this one outside. I know that’s a little hard for you folks who like to do a selfie every 5 minutes, but them’s the rules. After you go in and pay for valet parking and the entrance fee, you’re already out about a hundred bucks but it’s well worth the experience. Trust me.

magic castle

The place is an old castle with all kinds of interesting stuff around every corner. Before you even enter, there’s a wall of books that opens only by saying the magic words (hint: it’s open sesame). Then, there’s a little room behind the bar where a player piano takes requests if you put a bill in the bird cage next to it like a combination of magic and spooky. Of course, it’s Hollywood, so everything is done to the max.

The place is made up of a bunch of small rooms and we didn’t even see half of what’s there. Each room features shows by one of the magicians and there’s also a larger room featuring the main magician. I will say that the magic is AMAZING. But, some are a little creepy, like the main magician who ate a goldfish and then delivered it to the fishbowl unharmed. He also pulled a guinea pig out of his trousers. Both tricks got more groans than applause. I think he needs to update his act (he’s been performing in Vegas for a long time).

After dinner (and be sure to budget $100 per person for food that’s pretty mediocre), we got a private magic show from our host and another magician. The magic was amazing and very inventive. You definitely won’t get bored. I could have sat there for a long time watching whatever magic they chose to perform. The cast from the Broadway touring company of Les Mis was also the guest for this private show, which was really nice since we were seeing the play the next night. The actor playing Jean Valjean, Nick Cartell, and his wife sat next to me. He gave us a backstage tour after the show the next night, which was amazing. The stage of the Pantages is covered with a stage they bring with them in one of the 11 trucks that go from town to town for the show. It has groves that allow the big pieces like the barricade to move on and off while other pieces are suspended overhead and lowered when needed. That’s Nick at the end of our group pic. My daughter did my makeup for this one and I like it much better than the professional one.

The woman in the colorful dress is my son-in-law’s sister and she’s a hoot. She has her own style that folks love. I would look like a character in her getup but it works for her. The lovely woman in the red jacket is my daughter, the actor. Note that the three of us wore red and black and, if you’ve never seen the play, you won’t get it and you’re missing something really special. I’ve seen this live about 6 times with different casts in different cities, including on Broadway plus I own 2 video versions of the play, including the one with Hugh Jackman and Anne Hathaway. I’d put this performance up against any that I’ve seen. The cast is just amazing.

le miz
But, the week wasn’t all fun and games as there was still a LOT to due to get ready for everything in my career to come to a screeching halt. So, sometimes you have to act like an adult even if you don’t want to.

I had to finalize money from my retirement account, which is always so confusing. My parents are both gone and I blame them for being so private about anything having to do with money because I don’t understand anything about how to take distributions and I’d have loved some guidance as I approached retirement. At least, I saved enough (I think), so it’s just a matter of figuring out how to get the money and pay taxes, since every penny you saved is now taxable when you take it out.

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Preparing for an Active Retirement

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preparing for an active retirement

Maybe you anticipated retirement every morning when the alarm went off at 6:30 am. Or, maybe you’re reaching the age where retirement enters the planning horizon brought on by letters from AARP and Social Security with updates on your retirement account. Whatever the reason, the time is now to begin preparing for an active retirement. Looking at the image above, you see Pearl’s vision of retirement isn’t all that active.

So, let’s think about how to prepare for an active retirement. First, let’s think about how life changes with retirement:

  • You lose your income and, if retiring before 65, you lose your insurance
  • You no longer have something taking up 40-60 hours/ week
  • Family shrunk to just you and maybe a spouse
  • The family home might be too large now
  • Regardless of your current situation, health declines are inevitable

Preparing for an active retirement

Financial needs

Unfortunately (or fortunately, depending on your viewpoint), much is written about preparing for an active retirement, but focuses almost exclusively on financial planning.

The focus on financial needs post-retirement probably comes from the wealth management industry of brokers and advisors who rely on you for their living. The more you save for retirement, the more commissions they make, and, while it might seem enticing to retire with $1 million or more in your 401K, you don’t really need that much. Especially when you consider that life expectancy beyond age 65 averages only about 15 years, although life expectancy may be as little as 18 months for some professions. And, don’t forget that many seniors have substantial equity in their homes, adding to their retirement nest egg.

Certainly, financial planning is important when you retire, but it’s not the MOST important thing.

Boredom, loneliness

A bigger issue in preparing for an active retirement is figuring out what to do with all the extra hours in a day. Think about it — you got up early for decades, went to work often surrounded by colleagues, and raised families. Only to retire with little to do with all the hours stretching in front of you. Without careful planning, you likely face a future of boredom and loneliness.

My aunt complains of boredom and laments giving up her job, even though she worked well after 65 until bad knees made it impossible to be on her feet so much. She lives in the same community and has family in the area, but everyone has their own life, so she spends most of her days surrounded by her cats, and the television kept on for noise.

To avoid boredom and loneliness now is the time to plan for activities to fill your days.

  • Learn a hobby, especially one that involves other people, such as golf or bridge.

  • President Jimmy Carter

    Image courtesy of Habitat for Humanity

  • Begin volunteering somewhere you can make a difference. Look at former President Carter who still builds homes for Habitat for Humanity well into his 90’s. Schools always need folks to help with reading or other activities.
  • Check out the local senior center for activities. Many allow you to join before you’re retired
  • Think about transitioning to retirement by working part-time or less for your existing employer or in a similar field

Family

Your family likely is on their own now. And, as time goes by, you’ll lose your spouse. For many years the needs of your family filled your days, taking kids to soccer practice, going to school plays, meeting other moms at kid’s functions …

Now, all that’s gone.

So, how to fill that void. Folks like my neighbor fill their time babysitting their grandkids, something that works out well for their kids and them. However, as you age, keeping up with kids’ demands may challenge your strength and calm. So, think about ways you can stay active in the lives of your family. For instance, a friend reads bedtime stories to her grandkids every day via Facetime (an app on her iPhone).

Downsizing

Nows the time to think about downsizing your home. Maybe before you sell your home, think about getting rid of big, bulky furniture and things you never use. After all, you won’t be cooking and serving meals for a crowd anymore. Give unneeded objects away to charity or to help furnish your children’s homes. I’m sure they’ll appreciate whatever you don’t need.

You likely have many sentimental objects taking up space. Think of creative ways to save the memories without the bulk. For instance,

  • Turn a beloved children’s blanket into a square on a new blanket filled with other cloth memories, like a piece of a stuffed animal your child slept with every night.
  • Organize photos, and eliminate some less important ones. Do you really need 30 photos of your child’s graduation? Then, transfer them to digital format.
  • Donate books to a second-hand shop or a library. You’ll never re-read most of them anyway. Besides, reading from an e-reader allows you to enlarge the print for easy reading, thus containing 1000s of books in a compact form.
  • Knick knacks accumulate dust and clutter up your home. Get rid of them.

Stay healthy

The time is now to ensure you have a healthy retirement. Get enough sleep, drink a lot of water, and do something active every day, even if it’s only taking a walk. That’s where Pearl is a big part of my retirement planning. Every day we walk, getting in our 10,000 steps around the neighborhood or exploring trails in the area. Increasingly, communities plan for these low-impact spaces great for walking without all the hills that make hiking difficult. The more active you are now, the more active your future retirement.

OK, enough for today. Enjoy your day.

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